I recieved a message a little while back from someone I have talked to and she said something that made me think for a minute. She said…. “Dearest Ali… I have been thinking pretty hard about how u, do trans…. I like it. I like it a lot. You managed to blend who you are, with who you used to be.. Im watching you girl. Real hard. 💋 \m/” This was recieved from a FB friend who has been dealing with many of the same situations a lot of us deal with in regards to finding our true selves. How to find ourselves is a whole other set of issues because we all have our journeys, but how we travel the road is what matters.
How I “do trans” is much different than others. Not one is right and it’s all about your personal situation and needs to find your due course north. I have children and value the fact that I fathered them and that will not change for any reason. I pride myself on raising my children to be honest, respectful, and polite. They also know that when things need discussed, the door is always open. This is parenting, trans or not.
I “do trans” by not hiding who I was. I do outreach and support. I live an open life where people know my history from my kids friends to my new friends and everyone in between. I wear my heart on my sleeve and hold my transition as a testament to finally living. I didn’t come this far and survive 4 attempts just to disappear. I’m here as I am, like me or not.
I’ll continue to love my motorcycle and cars. I’ll still be running the back hoe and helping with Jessica’s horse. I’ll still be screaming at Macks hockey games. I’m not changing what I love, just who I was. My personality hasn’t changed, only my body has to match who I really was.
I “do trans” the same way I do the rest of my life. Brutally honest to a fault and flying by the seat of my pants. I’m spontaneous yet indecisive, I’m an introvert with an extroverted side yet the most important detail is I am me. I am a face for transgender people in my area who have no one and a voice for those who can’t cry out. I also care, but just about my family and friends, but for everyone. I care if people around me understand who I am and I want to be that friendly face that helps release the stigma transgender women have.
I am not a “man in a dress” or some pedophilic criminal. I’m a college graduate with a. 3.75 GPA in Psychology, I’m a parent to 3 amazing children, and I’m a person. I am a female that just took a few more years to mature and no matter what hate any internet badass might want to spew, I will continue to live. I’m not going to lay down nor am I going to go quietly into that good night. I will be here for everyone who cares about me, and to everyone out there who wants to hate me for it… I’ll be here just to piss you off because I will continue to live on and not yield to anyone. I will not live a life of misery for anyone.
That my friends is how I do trans.